Welcome, Ladies and Gentlefolk, to the home of all things Wet and Towely. Here you will find an answer to all your Wet Towel needs, such as "What are 'Wet Towels'?", "What difference would having a Wet Towel make in my life?" and "What the hell are you talking about?" So please, make yourself at home. Stick your feet up on the coffee table, and puruse our blogs, check out the latest and most accurate news stories from around the world, read over the philosophies of Wet Towels, have your problems solved by our Agony Uncle at Colm's Column, and chat with like-minded psychopaths in our forums. Oh, and keep your hands off the silverware!
News
SUNDAY, OCTOBER 19, 2008
Wet Towels Showbiz Update: Big Break for a Wet Towel
The showbiz world was recently rocked by revelations regarding the Wet Towels. One of the lesser known members, 100% Cotton, Landed a role in top T.V. Drama C.S.I., which officially endoresed the Wet Towel movement, at one point going so far as to say the phrase “Wet Towel” in a scene with Mr. Cotton, clearly identifying him and bringing our organisation, so long repressed by the Jewish Hollywood media elite, into the limelight.
We have for many years campaigned against the aparthid which exists in Hollywood, whereby the parts which should by all rights be played by Wet Towels, such some mildly homoerotic hijinks with frat boys whipping each other with towels in the locker rooms, are instead played by mildly damp towels which had been made to look much wetter than they actually were. This inbuilt prejeduce against Wet Towels has made 100% Cotton's rise to fame all the more impressive, and just goes to show that when you have true talent, it will be recognised, even with bias such as exists in the current Hollywood climate. We would like to thank the producers of C.S.I for taking a stand against the elite of today's media, and we salute 100% Cotton for his perseverance in the face of such horrible bigotry. We wish him every success with his future projects, and will follow his career with great interest.